joyce (joyce) wrote,
joyce
joyce

how to be a ditz

1. Get to the library after meeting with your independent study professor, feeling all smart and read to finish the reading you need to do for your 6:00 class. Go into your bookbag to pull out your lunch to finish that you started before yon meeting with yon professor. Go to pull out your book to read. Notice that it's not in your bag.
2. Curse, with vim and vigor. Think back to when you had it last. Decide that it was when you were eating lunch, part one, over in the basement of the classroom building, right before you spilled tea all over yourself and went to the restroom to clean up. Thus, it must be in the restroom or in your professor's office.
3. Run back to the classroom building. Not in the basement, not in the restroom, not in the lost and found in the religious studies office. Your professor is in a departmental meeting.
4. Check the library catelouge online. Not only is the book not on reserve, like all textbooks are supposed to be, but the library does not have a copy of the translation that is being used in your class at all. Curse.
5. Go over to the library and check the reserve room just in case the catalouge lies. Curse, a lot.
6. Go back to the classroom building. Spend the next couple of hours perched outside your professor's office, reading other homework, since the office is convienently located right next to your 6:00 class. When she gets back, look like a moron checking her office for your book. Not there. Decide you must have left it in the restroom downstairs after all and someone has run off with it. Curse, silently. Thank your professor.
7. Go to class and bitch endlessly to your classmates, who are sympathetic. Get through class just fine, since you've still done more reading than most of them. Plan to buy another copy of the book in the morning, even though that was $15 you really didn't want to spend on another copy of this book.
8. Walk into your boss's office the next morning to ask her something. There sits your book. Do a little dance of joy and wave your hands around and hug your book and amuse your boss. Think back carefully again, and realize that your physical memory from yesterday had been off; you hadn't actually been reading the book in the basement of the classroom building yesterday. The only thing that you'd pulled out of your bag was lunch, part one. Wish for a new memory. Thank whoever is listening that your book was left at work, which is about the only place on campus where it was guaranteed not to walk off.

So, yea. I may be smart, but I'm also certainly a ditz most of the time.
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